These episodes come back to haunt the initiator along with initiated.
Multitudes that are hungry
for promises of sundry buxom angels and everlasting spring.

In return, for oceans of blood.

There is, the passing of electricity, from body to body, from eye to eye,
from the one to many.
Sometimes there is pain, then denial and finally acceptance.
And inevitably, there is blinding light;
why not total darkness?

Always, it is extra real.

My journey has not been extra-terrestrial.
I started with nothing else but inherited and acquired sin. And was
looking for total delight, now.

I had no axe to grind.

The trick, as always, is to travel inside
and, to let the garbage be. No guilt,
no nostalgia, no pity.
No greed for an esoteric afterlife, no purgatory.
No shining path to tread, no theorems.
To shed skin, outdated sin and let the garbage be. And not to
acquire furthermore.

They call it going to the forest with the wind in the tree.

And nowadays, after cleaning my teeth,
as I brush my hair, I think of heaven,
and know I am almost there.